ONE YEAR IN THAILAND

Today I have been in Thailand for ONE YEAR! WOW! WHAT A YEAR! Never did I think this year would be like this! I came here to do rehab…stay for 2-4 weeks then go on to India. Well, that didn’t happen at all! Yes I got my Indian Visa and flight, and the same day India announced them closing the borders in 3 days! I was “happily stuck” on an island with no Covid the next 4 months. I walked on the beaches, I had people to talk to and we created community around us..until there was only 5 of us left there. In the 4 months I was there I meditated, I learned that I could let go of the guilt of loving my time alone with myself. I didn't realized how much pressure I’d put on myself to be social. I listened to things on Youtube I never made time for. I learned a lot in my time there…I went to a shaman for my knee. It was a beautiful time…it had it’s challenges too…like the landlord that almost ran me over and said he would next time..having to go to the police about that. But over all it was a beautiful time there. My knee initially got better! I was able to walk farther and farther and then it go worse. I went from walking 1.5 hours to 10 minutes. At the end of the 4 months I was feeling called to go to Bangkok to get my knee checked out. A neighbor came to me the next day and said he was going half way to Bangkok that weekend and he wanted to know if I needed a ride. WOW! Talk about manifestation! It feels like last year was all about calling things in…like coming to Thailand, this ride and then what came next…..

I got to Bangkok and the 2nd morning here my ACL finished tearing. I found an MRI place and confirmed it…I manifested an amazing Physiotherapist that recommended me to the 2nd best knee surgeon in Thailand…a sweet little home that wasn’t too far from everything I needed to be at and within a month I was in surgery. I was taken care of for 15 days after surgery by complete strangers coming to my home…I thought when I made the request on the FB page I’d get 2 or 3 people a week..but nope…I got 1-2 people a day coming by bringing me food and hanging out with me! It was amazing! And so nourishing! The last 7 months have been all about healing, rehab, learning to walk again, jog, run and now hopping. And all the stuff that comes with it like the setbacks, and the celebrations of walking 2 hours…all of it! Walking to my favorite cafes were huge wins for me! Now I am working on unwinding my hip from walking differently. The past month has brought me the kink community…thank goodness! I needed connection…rope and community! I now have people I am getting to know…building friendships with. Last week I got to play with some of my new friends which was a breath of fresh air. This past month parts of me are waking up again. I started teaching my couples work again…which has felt incredible! And a student signed up on my Only Fans page unexpectedly as I had shut down all avenues to find it…but he had saved the link and I am now learning that I love writing about my intimate work…just not on social media as I always have to wonder if I will be taken down…and there I don’t have to worry about it…so I am opening more to the possibility of creating more content there! Which so far has been fun to do!!! It is exciting now…I actually woke up this morning in excited about what I could share there! As everything is allowed there!

I have spent most of this past year reflecting, listening inward and looking at my passions…I loving doing anything physical…anything to do with the body…I love gathering women…I love talking about intimate conversations…and now with the kink community it is opening so much in me! It hasn’t been the best year of my life…but I will say this, it has tested my trust of the Universe, of myself and of life. I will say I feel I have won the test, even if I break down in tears every month or so…as I miss dancing and hiking…I live mostly in trust, knowing I will heal and I will dance and hike again! I know this year here has opened my eyes to wanting to live outside of the country…next time by choice though. I have places I want to live now and I am excited to do that once the pandemic calms! And this year has gotten me to start teaching online…never did that before…such a wonderful thing to have technology to support me and everyone! So here’s to a year here and who knows how much longer!